GUEST COMMENTARY: Language in the 21st century ‘bears watching'

In Lewis Carroll’s story, “Through the Looking Glass,” Humpty Dumpty tells Alice: “When I say a word, it means what I choose it to mean.” That might be fine for Humpty, but it just doesn’t work for you and me.

If we’re going to effectively communicate with others, we must care for the meanings of the words we use.

Sometimes the misuse of words can have hilarious results. I once saw a story in a Northern California newspaper that stated, “The hills are being worn down by eroticism.” I didn’t know that was possible. Of course,  they meant to say erosion.

There also have been some humorous classified ads run in papers, such as “Illiterate, write today for help.” Or “Dog for sale, eats anything, fond of children.” Or “Three-year-old teacher needed for preschool, experienced preferred.” Or “For sale, antique desk, suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.”

English is a crazy language and I feel sorry for people trying to learn it.
We have words that combine two reasonable words to form new ones with different meanings.

For example, there’s a pineapple, but it’s neither an apple or a pine. We have the mushroom (a vegetable), but it’s neither the goop babies eat (mush) or a part of a building (room).

Then, there’s a parsnip (a root vegetable) and that’s neither what a golfer hopes to get (par) or a snip (a quick cut).

There are other reasons English is so difficult. One of these is our use of synonyms, antonyms and homonyms.

Most people are familiar with synonyms and antonyms.

Synonyms are two different words that have similar meanings, such as big and large. Antonyms are opposite words, such as large and small.

Homonyms, however, are much more confusing.

Homonyms are words that share the same pronunciation, but have different meanings and are usually spelled the same.

An example of a homonym is bear. It can be a large animal or mean to carry something. You might say he couldn’t bear the weight of the bear.

Also, there’s left (the direction) or left (past tense of leave). Again, you could say he turned left as he left the house.

To make matters worse, there’s spin off of homonyms called heteronyms. These are words that are spelled the same, but have different pronunciations and meanings.

An example of a heteronym is desert. It means to abandon and an arid region. You might say the soldier decided to desert (abandon) his post in the desert (the region).

Another strange one is present. This means to give something to someone, the actual gift, the current time or being in attendance.

Think of it this way, she thought she would present (give) the present (the gift) at the present time, while the people were present (in attendance).

Isn’t English grand?

When you were a child, you might have heard your parents say, “Watch you language, young man” or “Watch your language, young lady.”

I know I heard my parents say that and it worked.

Over the years, I’ve tried to watch my language and care for the meanings of words that I speak and write.

Now, I’m asking you to do the same. Try to think of words as a carpenter’s tools and care for them just as the carpenter cares for his tools. It will make a difference in how you communicate.

Watch your language, please.

Ray Cauwet is a freelance writer living in the Porterville area.